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| From our readers |
| Q: What's the difference
between an Irish funeral and an Irish wedding? A: One person.
cecelia.friedman@american.edu
One day, an Irishman was standing by the side of a busy road, looking at
the sky and saying, "Ninety-eight, ninety-eight" over and over to himself.
Presently another, non-Irishman came up to him and asked, "What are you
doing?"
The Irishman answered, "Oh, it's really neat! Just stand in the middle
of the road, look up and say, 'Ninety-eight' over and over again!"
The non-Irishman readily agreed, and he was soon run over and squashed flat
as a pancake.
The Irishman smiled, looked back up to the sky and said, "Ninety-nine,
ninety-nine ..."
queen_amidala@starwarsobsessed.zzn.com
Q: What is the difference between an Irish wedding and
an Irish funeral?
A: One less drunk!
ladypuddles@webtv.net
Q:
What's Irish and stays out all night?
A: Patty O'Furniture
Q: Why are there only 239 beans
in Irish stew?
A: Because one more bean will make it farty
Tony Sostok
scrntnpa@aol.com |
| From other quarters |
McQuillan walked into a bar
and ordered martini after martini, each time removing the olives and placing them in a
jar.
When the jar was filled with olives and all the drinks consumed, he started to leave.
"S'cuse me," said a customer, who was puzzled over what McQuillan had done.
"What was that all about?"
"Nothing," he replied. "My wife just sent me out for a jar of olives."
Sean was fishing and it started to rain,
so he moved under the bridge for shelter.
His pal McGinty saw him and called,
"Sean, me boy, are ye afeared of a few spots o' rain, now?"
Sean replied, "I'm not ... the fish come here fer shelter."
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Mick and Paddy were walking home after a night on the beer when a
severed head rolled along the ground.
Mick picked it up to his face and said to Paddy, "Jeez, that looks like Sean,"
to which Paddy replied, "No, Sean was taller than that"
Jimmy-Joe was toolin' along one
fine day when the local policeman, a friend of his, pulled him over.
"What's wrong, Seamus?" Jimmy-Joe asked.
"Well didn't ya know, Jimmy-Joe, that your wife fell out of the car about five miles
back?" said Seamus.
"Ah, praise the Almighty!" he replied with relief. "I thought I'd gone
deaf!" |
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